Last San Diego Night

Finally everyone has been told that I would be leaving... yes the teachers at my work were just told on Thursday of my last work week! At least everything is out in the open now and I can talk about it freely and update my facebook!

This is my last night in San Diego. My room is a mess. I have been so drained at work, just trying to tie up loose ends, to train the new girl, etc. Then every evening I am supposed to be packing, even though I am trying to see friends, go to my favorite restaurants a last time (not to mention a last good dose of Mexican food, thank you for the reminder Ryan!) and I am just exhausted and can't stand to spend one more minute putting something in a box.



I don't feel anxious about my move at all. I think I'm just worried that I'm not realizing the magnitude of what's happening! I have no qualms about leaving San Diego. I love our center here, but otherwise, I never felt "meant" to be here, for any stretch of time really. I always fed off of the students' excitement of the city: they loved the beach, the weather, the city. They are alays beaming just to be here. They love the California lifestyle and laidback attitude. I would think "yeah, it is nice" and feed off of their emotions, but it never really called to me. Though I've lived by the beach for the past 6 years, I am by no means a "beach" person. I've always wanted to get out of California. I'm glad I'm taking this opportunity.

I've moved away to go to college, and I've moved away to study abroad for a year. But those were all temporary, and I knew it. This is weird because it's indefinite. Who knows what will happen, and sometimes it's scary to leave and think "what if I end up feeling like..." but what's worse is the thought of just staying somewhere that's so vanilla to me. Maybe it won't work out, maybe I'll feel lonely, maybe I'll want to move back. But I'd rather do that knowing I tried. It all feels like I should've made this decision years ago!